The most powerful way to heal others is to heal yourself.
No, really. Read that again.
It’s not just a nice idea. It’s not a bumper sticker or something a guru in a flowy robe chants while burning incense. It’s the rock-bottom, absolute beginning of any fundamental transformation.
You want to help others? Want to be a light, a guide, a steady presence? Then you start by turning inward.
Healing yourself begins with love. But not just any love, the kind you show to others while ignoring your own needs. This is about loving yourself first. Fiercely. Honestly. Patiently.
Love is healing.
But how can you love someone you barely know?
And that’s the rub. You’ve got to get to know yourself. Deeply.
That means asking the fundamental questions:
Who are you, beneath all the roles you play?
What are you feeling when no one’s asking?
What do you actually want for yourself?
Not what you think you should want. Not what they told you to like. What do you want?
How do you FEEL, right now!
And here’s something that might shake your foundation a little:
The answers to these questions? They’re not out there.
They’re not on a page in a self-help book (not even this one).
Not in a three-step system.
Not in some ancient whisper from a mystic sitting cross-legged on a mountain top.
You won’t find yourself by giving up all your worldly goods or chanting until your voice gives out. You won’t find it by pretending not to care about things like love, success, or even money. Those aren’t the problems.
The problem is disconnection from yourself.
This isn’t about your job.
Or your ex.
Or how spiritual you appear on social media.
This is about you. You, and you alone.
Let me repeat it, and I will keep saying it:
How do you feel?
Not “how should you feel?”
Not “how do you think others want you to feel?”
But right now, in this very moment. What’s going on inside you?
Because here’s a truth that’s been hiding in plain sight:
How you feel is how you show up.
Your energy, your vibe, your frequency, that’s what the world meets when it meets you.
And you, my friend, are electrically charged.
That’s not poetry. That’s biology.
Every single cell in your body pulses with electrical activity. And emotions? They are charged, too. They move. They shift. They send signals through your nervous system. They tweak your posture. Your voice. Your facial expressions.
They literally change the shape of your presence.
And people feel it.
Even if they don’t know what they’re feeling, they pick it up. The tension. The joy. The storm. The stillness. All of it.
We affect each other, all the time. Without trying. Without even speaking.
So, here’s the punchline:
Who is shaping your experience?
Is it the people around you?
Or is it your state, silently setting the stage?
That’s the secret most people miss.
You are not a passive player in your reality.
You are the frequency generator.
You are the one setting the emotional tone.
And once you tune into that? Once you notice, accept, and begin to take care of your emotional landscape?
That’s when you become magnetic.
That’s when you start healing.
And not just yourself, but others, too. Simply by being real, present, and in tune.
So, again, slowly, gently:
How do you feel?
Because when you are truly healed, by yourself, within yourself, something extraordinary begins to happen, you radiate healing.
You don’t need to perform rituals. No healing hands. No lavender oil or sage smoke (unless you enjoy the scent). No Big Pharma cocktail of side-effects and suppression.
Your very being becomes the balm.
You walk into a room, and the room changes. You speak, and people soften. You sit in silence, and others feel safe. Not because you’re doing anything, but because you are something. Whole. Honest. Grounded.
Healing energy doesn’t require performance. It doesn’t demand credentials or costumes. It simply requires truth. Embodied truth.
When you are aligned, when your inner world is calm and true, that energy flows outward naturally. Not as a task, but as a byproduct. You don’t need to “try to help.” You don’t need to “heal” anyone. The need to do dissolves, and the power of being takes its place.
Imagine the world we’d create if more of us focused inward first, if more of us were courageous enough to ask, and keep asking, “How do I feel?”
From this question comes clarity. From clarity, compassion. From compassion, connection.
And from connection… comes healing. Effortless, shared, silent healing.
That’s the kind of presence that heals, not with effort, but with essence.
So, again, slowly, gently:
“How do you feel?”
Start there.
Come back to it.
And let that question become your daily return to self.
Because everything else flows from that.
“How do you feel?”
Robert A Burns
28th June 2025